Emojis to get you laid…..

Emojis may be the key to getting responses from your text messages. That may be the difference between weak game and game that is on point. Ladies and gentlemen, listen up! Clover, a dating app, has looked into the texting habits of it’s 3 million users to see which emojis got the most responses. Including the ones that had you left on read.

Emojis: What to use

Check out the infographic below to see which emojis both men and women love to respond to, which emojis they love to send and what ones don’t really do it for them. Perhaps unsurprisingly men don’t like to receive the diamond ring emoji. For the ladies if you want to have a man respond to you, use classic flirty emojis. Such as a winky face or little pink hearts. Could even use the red lips one and the guy your talking to will most likely respond.

For the guys, don’t use the eggplant emoji! Nor the flexed arm or the fist bump. Try using the sassy girl emoji, a tongue out emoji seems to do rather well too!

The survey found that in general emoji use resulted in people being more likely to respond to you. With men being 8% more likely to respond if there is an emoji in the opener and women are 5% more likely to respond if an emoji is used in an opener.

So now in lockdown, the best way to get a date after all this is over, is to throw in an emoji in an opener!


(Elite Daily)


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Bio Penis UPDATE!

Imagine, having the BEST, WORST luck ever?! No, think again! Because boy do we have some news for you!

Remember Mohammed Abad from the Bionic Balls Part 2 EP?, Well for those that dont know who he is, he’s the 43 year old Scottish fella who lost his love stick, his disco stick, his purple headed solider, his tonsil tickler, his trouser snake, you guessed it, his penis in a car accident when he was a child has since been given a bionic penis and lost his virginity – Mohammed operates his penis by pushing a button on his testicles to inflate and another one to deflate. Mr Nim Christopher, the consultant neurologist who built the penis every man wants (wait you’ll see why) said: ‘It will stay up as long as he wants and then when he’s had enough he switches the off button.’  – Doctors also informed him that when he went to get his penis – ‘You’ve got a big arm, so we’ll be able to make you a big penis’

Well we have an UPDATE people

He is looking for love because he has a lot to give:

Mohammed told The Mirror: ‘I’m very lonely and would love to find someone. I’ve joined and an Asian dating site and I’ve even tried Tinder, but so far I’ve had no feedback. Not one date. I’d be eternally grateful if someone helped me find love, I’ve got a lot to give. The ­ultimate goal is to have two kids but I need to find somebody first” 

He has normal levels of testosterone and and doctors believe he will be able to have children.

So a big dick and can go for as long as he wants without a care in the world. Silver linings and all that Mohammed. Silver linings.