SWISSGEAR 15inch Notebook Bag!

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Credit: Amazon

Credit: Amazon

Funk Butcher recently was on the hunt for a new durable bag and discovered the SWISSGEAR 15inch notebook bag. It’s hard wearing and really durable, and holds A LOT of stuff. Funk even said himself that it could hold roughly up to 2 weeks worth of clothing. Whether or not that holds true is up to you to decide, but it looks like it can hold A LOT of stuff:

 

Credit:Amazon

Credit:Amazon

It comes with and internal pocket includes special pouch to secure and hold a CD Player (who still uses those?) or an MP3 player with an external headphone port so it never has to leave your bag! Either way for £50 it looks like a great bargain!

Buy Now!

GameVice Fun!

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Credit:Gamevice.com

Credit:Gamevice.com

Here at How To Kill An Hour we LOVE the GameVice gaming controller for iPhone 6! Just ask Funk Butcher! Some say he is still in the chair from 2 weeks ago and is STILL playing Final Fantasy 7! Gamevice is basically like your PS4 or Xbox One controller but for your iPhone or Idevice (Ipad Pro version coming soon!) It comes equipped with triggers, buttons and joysticks just like a home console controller! So no more greasy fingers on that nice retina screen of yours! Best of all it is completely lag free and connects simply via lightning, just plug and play! Download the GameVice Live app to see what games are compatible and away you go!

To hear more of our thoughts listen to EP 50 Leonardo-D*ck-Caprio or EP 52 Dildo Hoverboard!!!

Available now! (£79.95)

For more information please click here!

 

Crazy VR Tech!

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Credit: Nokia

Credit: Nokia

Remember Nokia, the BIG, well used to be BIG, like HUGE, mobile phone manufacturer, well they arent dead and buried yet. They are BACK in the form of VR cameras!

VR is blowing up! Nokia is happy to help you ride the new wave that is VR, with Nokia creating a VR Broadcasting option for its Ozo Camera (worth $60K) which will show 360-degree video as it happens, complete with spatial audio.

While the likes of you and I wont be able to afford to experiment with it, streaming providers and other broadcasters will be able to play soon.

With the camera reaching a handful of partners in the spring and hopefully be widely available this summer, so don’t be surprised if immersive videos are commonplace in the near future.

Bio Penis UPDATE!

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credit:guff.com

credit:guff.com

Imagine, having the BEST, WORST luck ever?! No, think again! Because boy do we have some news for you!

Remember Mohammed Abad from the Bionic Balls Part 2 EP?, Well for those that dont know who he is, he’s the 43 year old Scottish fella who lost his love stick, his disco stick, his purple headed solider, his tonsil tickler, his trouser snake, you guessed it, his penis in a car accident when he was a child has since been given a bionic penis and lost his virginity – Mohammed operates his penis by pushing a button on his testicles to inflate and another one to deflate. Mr Nim Christopher, the consultant neurologist who built the penis every man wants (wait you’ll see why) said: ‘It will stay up as long as he wants and then when he’s had enough he switches the off button.’  – Doctors also informed him that when he went to get his penis – ‘You’ve got a big arm, so we’ll be able to make you a big penis’

Well we have an UPDATE people

He is looking for love because he has a lot to give:

Mohammed told The Mirror: ‘I’m very lonely and would love to find someone. I’ve joined Match.com and an Asian dating site and I’ve even tried Tinder, but so far I’ve had no feedback. Not one date. I’d be eternally grateful if someone helped me find love, I’ve got a lot to give. The ­ultimate goal is to have two kids but I need to find somebody first” 

He has normal levels of testosterone and and doctors believe he will be able to have children.

So a big dick and can go for as long as he wants without a care in the world. Silver linings and all that Mohammed. Silver linings. 

The Faithful Mattress!!

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Well here’s one for the paranoid lovers out there, someone has come up with a surefire way** to tell infidelity!

There’s a mattress (costing £1,200) which informs you when your partner is CHEATING! (*If they have sex on your bed)

According to its Spanish manufacturers Durmet, it has concealed sensors that are supposed to detect sexy movements and send a text to you or your partners phone depending, if well you know…

The company’s hilarious tagline is:

‘If your partner isn’t faithful, then at least your mattress will be,’ according to the company’s slogan.

Apparently the technology is so advanced,they will be able to see in real time which parts of the bed are being used.

Better to be safe than sorry, right?

Miserable Netflix!

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Credit: Twitter

Credit: Twitter

Happiness does not come from binge watching that, stop it, go outside and speak to the opposite sex!!

According to new research from the University of Toledo, Netflix binge-watching, could make you miserable – describing it as “a growing public health concern that needs to be addressed”.

400 people surveyed and results screened for Tv Addiction, 77 percent watched two or more hours of TV a day on average and 35 percent described themselves as “binge-watchers”. Binge-watching had a positive correlation with poor mental and physical wellbeing, so think twice before you sit there and let that timer run down to 0!

Self Lacing Nike’s!

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Everything in movies eventually comes true, just like bluetooth phones in Star Trek, now self lacing shoes!

We’re still waiting for the Back to the Future Styled Nike Mag, Nike has revealed its first self lacing shoe – all be it in a different style – “Nike HyperAdapt 1.0”

The shoe senses the wearers heel and tightens its laces accordingly. Though once the shoe is on, the wearer can adjust the fit with two buttons on the side to get things perfect.

Nike is already looking forward to versions that adjust fit on the fly, as the athlete needs more or less tension.

HyperAdapt 1.0 is set to arrive around Christmas and will go on sale only to Nike+ members for an unspecified price.

Let the streaming wars begin!

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Credit: Alux.com

Credit: Alux.com

Jay Z being a business  man once again and ripping off the little guy!

Jay Z already pulled ‘Reasonable Doubt’ off Spotify before he launched TIDAL – recently he has quietly pulled his 2001 Blueprint Albums off of ALL streaming services but his own, (Spotify, Apple Music, Amazon Music, GooglePlay)

However you can still listen to the majority of  Jay Z’s back-catalogue on those music services – he’s only pulled BluePrint.

Invisibility Maybe!

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Credit: Telegraph

Credit: Telegraph

We’ve been getting closer and closer to real life invisibility cloaks for a while now, – but we’re not just quite Harry Potter – yet.

There has been an advancement in a special type of material from Iowa State University which guards whatever its placed on from Cameras – you’ll still be seen via the naked eye – even when watching a video feed – you’ll only be hidden from other machines or radar.  This type of tech could be used in a stealth fighter jet for example.

The University of California at Berkeley have developed another type of invisibility tech that reflects light to keep objects hidden.

This method uses special gold antennas to “reroute reflected light waves” so that the thing it covers was invisible when the material was turned on by switching the gold’s polarization.

For now it’s just working on a microscopic scale, measuring “barely” 80 nanometers thick and only large enough to cover a few biological cells.

Anonymous War!

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Credit: BuisnessInsider

Credit: BuisnessInsider

Whatever you do boys, do not p*ss off Anonymous. They will come for you and they will come HARD! (That does not sound right)

Anonymous have announced a war on international dick-head Donald Trump – again. First time when they posted a message to the candidate in 2015 regarding his comments concerning Muslims.

They hope to bring down many of Trump’s personal and business sites using #OpTrump, but also halt his presidential bid by uncovering and exposing embarrassing information:

”your inconsistent and hateful campaign has not only shocked the United States America, you have shocked the entire planet with your appalling actions and ideas.”

The collective has already posted unverified personal information about Trump and staff, including his social security number.